It had been two days since the incident, and I hadn’t left my bed much. The blinds were closed, blocking the sun, and my blanket was pulled tightly over me like a shield. The only time I’d emerged from my room was for breakfast and dinner, and even then, it was because Dad had practically dragged me to the table.
Mom didn’t ask me anything about college. She didn’t ask what I planned to do next. She just sat there, quiet and aloof as always. It was like she had given up on me. The silence from her hurt more than anything she could have said.
A loud, persistent knock on my door snapped me out of my thoughts. It was Dad, no doubt, dropping off another motivational quote. But then, a familiar voice followed.
“Open this door before I bang the door.”
Maddy. And I knew she would make good on that threat if I didn’t get up. She was that crazy.
“Shit,” I muttered under my breath as I scrambled out of bed to unlock the door.
When she stepped in, “Christ, this place looks like a scary dungeon, not a room,” Maddy said, her eyes narrowing at the dimly lit space. She wasted no time walking over to the blinds and yanking them open, letting the blinding sun spill into the room.
She’d dyed her hair brown, with the tips bright pink. She wore a tight mini dress—bright yellow with black stripes down the sides—that clung to her like it was custom-made. Her face was perfectly painted with bold eyeliner and glossy lips. Yeah, Maddy was living her best life.
“I’m fine,” I said, knowing what was coming next.
“Then why have you been locked in your room for two days?” Her heavily made-up nose scrunched up in disapproval.
“I knew Dad was the one who called you over,” I said, rolling my eyes.
“He was worried. And I’m your best friend. I should make you feel better.”
“Thank you. Truly, thank you for your care and concern, but I don’t think you can make me feel better.”
“What do you want?” she asked, sitting down on the bed beside me.
What did I want? Something Maddy couldn’t give me. She couldn’t reverse Harvard’s decision. She couldn’t make Mom see through me. And she certainly couldn’t stop me from feeling like a failure.
How did Jessica do it? Was it just because she got into Harvard? Or was it because she was, well, perfect?
“Try me out, Char. Come on.”
“Honestly, I’m fine.”
“Argh,” Maddy groaned, rolling her eyes. “I knew you’d say that, which is why I’m taking matters into my own hands. I brought you two bits of good news.”
“Which is?” I asked, my voice flat, but curiosity still got the better of me.
“The first is that Westbridge College in Seattle accepted me…” She paused dramatically, drumming her fingers on the bed. “And you.”
I rolled my eyes again. Going to Westbridge was the last thing I planned on doing.
“How did you know?”
“Your dad told me.”
Of course. Dad still had my iPad. Great.
“It could be fun, you know. You and I are going to the same college? Can you imagine that? We’d run that place,” she said, her voice excited. Her eyes practically glowed, even behind her indigo-colored contacts.
“I’m not going.”
“Harvard or nothing?”
I nodded.
“You know, you could stay a year and then defer.”
“Nope, not that either.”
I didn’t see the point. I’d work hard, reapply, and get in next year. No detours.
Maddy just nodded, not pushing it. The silence that followed was unexpected, and I could tell she was plotting something. She was never this quiet unless she was up to no good.
“What are you up to?”
“Nothing much,” she said innocently before launching at me and tickling my sides.
“Stop that.” I yelped, laughing despite myself as I tried to push her away.
“So, I failed to get you excited about the first news,” Maddy said, still tickling me, “but I’m sure you’ll be excited when you hear the second.”
“Then stop tickling me.” A gasp pulled out of me between laughter.
“Promise me you’ll listen with a positive mindset.”
“I promise.”
She finally stopped, sitting back with a mischievous grin. “You promised, right?”
“Yeah, whatever.” I rolled my eyes, but a part of me was curious about what she was about to say.
She gave a pointed look. “Remember how we used to have fun when we were kids?”
“Nope,” I said quickly. We’d done a lot as kids, and I wasn’t about to start thinking about it when my emotions were this raw.
“Come on, think of something,” Maddy urged, her voice filled with that relentless cheerfulness.
“Watching SpongeBob all day long?”
“Ew, nope.”
“Creating DIY content.”
“Nope, think again.”
“Vacation to Caleb’s parents’ beach house?”
“Bingo, that’s it.”
As a kid, I used to get so excited about those trips. We piled into the car every summer and headed to the beach house. It was this big, beautiful thing perched on the cliffs, with the waves crashing below. I could still feel my nine-year-old self bouncing in the backseat, face pressed against the window as we got closer, heart racing excitedly. I had lived for those vacations.
But that was a long time ago.
“Jeez, that’s the second piece of news?” I asked, trying to hide how uninterested I was. I leaned back on my bed, crossing my arms.
Maddy nodded eagerly. She bounced on her heels, eyes wide with excitement.
“How’s that exciting?”
“Are you seriously asking that? Beach, vacation, boys, random flings. That’s what’s exciting.”
She wasn’t wrong. A vacation would’ve been perfect—any other time. I hadn’t had one in forever, and a break would be nice. But right now? When was everything a mess? It just didn’t feel right.
“A vacation is nice, but—” I started.
“Nope. No ‘but’ here.” Maddy cut me off. “Let’s take a few weeks to loosen up, and then you can return all refreshed and reapply at Harvard.”
“I don’t know.”
The sun on my skin sounded nice, too lovely- the saltwater in the air. It was appealing. Who wouldn’t want that? But it felt off. The timing wasn’t right. Everything with Mom, the Harvard rejection, I couldn’t just escape.
“Don’t say that, Char, like you don’t like the idea.”
“It’s not that I don’t like it. It’s just that now is not a good time. Mom’s still disappointed, and I want to, I don’t know, placate her somehow.”
I had to try even if I didn’t know how to do that. Harvard was still on the table for me. I wasn’t giving up anytime soon.
“Your mom’s not going to stay angry for long. She’ll come around.”
I hoped she was right.
“I still have to prepare to reapply, start online classes, and all.”
“That doesn’t stop you from taking a vacation.”
I sighed. She wasn’t going to let this go, not without a fight. Maddy never did.
“I’ll think about it.”
I wasn’t going. She’d send me photos of everything while I’d be holed up at home studying until midnight. I could already picture her sunny selfies while I sat in the dark with textbooks. It would drive me insane.
“Okay, fine. But think fast, ’cause we plan to take this vacation soon.”
“We?” I asked, narrowing my eyes.
“Caleb and I.”
I gave her a look, pure disbelief washing over me. Caleb? Seriously? The dude had dropped off the face of the earth after getting into college. And now, all of a sudden, they were planning vacations?
“You’re planning to take a vacation with Caleb?”
“It was his idea.”
“That’s a lie.”
“Fine. I told him I missed our old beach trips, and he was like, ‘Let’s do another.’”
“After forgetting about us for two years?”
“Someone sounds hurt.” She nudged my shoulder with hers, a teasing smirk on her lips.
“Yeah, I won’t forget about my friends.”
“That’s not even the worst part.”
I shot her a look. My eyebrows arched, waiting for whatever bomb she was about to drop.
“There’s more?”
Maddy nodded, biting her lip like she had the juiciest secret ever.
“Of course, I live for juicy deets.”
She was correct; Maddy had always been the one with the juiciest gossip, and despite everything, I couldn’t help but love her for it.
“What’s that?”
“Landon Gray is tagging along.”
I blinked. Oh no.
That was something I never saw coming.
“That’s a lie.”
“This time around, it’s the truth,” Maddy replied.
“Holy hell.” Thank God I wasn’t going. He’d ruin the entire vacation experience for me if I were.
“Hope this news won’t affect your decision to come?”
“Nope.” It would’ve, but since I wasn’t planning to go, it didn’t matter. I couldn’t imagine myself stuck on a beach with Landon.
“Right, because he’s your sister’s ex, not yours,” Maddy drilled, clearly not understanding why I hated Landon as much as I did.
“Doesn’t mean he’s not a jerk and didn’t break my sister’s heart.”
“That was years ago when they were still teenagers. Get over it, Char.”
I couldn’t just “get over it.”
Jessica had really loved him. He was the guy she’d given her virginity to despite her vow of chastity. I remembered lying beside her in bed, listening to her talk about their future. Three kids. A big beach house in the countryside. She was so in love. And then, out of nowhere, he bailed on her like Lando Calrissian betraying Han Solo in The Empire Strikes Back.
And if there was one thing I didn’t fail at, it was being a protective sister.